I’ve been thinking about this topic a lot lately and felt obliged to share my thoughts with all of you. I’m sure you have often heard the saying, “comparison is the thief of joy,” which is completely true; however, it can steal so much more from you than joy. I know we are all guilty of comparing ourselves to our neighbor, co-worker, friend, family member, high school acquaintance, etc. Comparison is everywhere. I am not here to tell you that it is going to go away, who am I to judge? The moment you start celebrating others’ victories instead of using them as a measurement for your own life events, you can concentrate on making yourself the best version of you.
Look, it took me 6 years to graduate undergrad.. SIX YEARS. People who entered college after me were graduating before me and it was tough to not notice how everyone else was progressing around me. This way of thinking just takes away from my accomplishment. As much of an “expectation” graduating a four-year school is still only 37% people are doing it. I just recently started working out again after two years of not having a consistent gym routine. Getting back to the gym was TOUGH. So many people who knew exactly what they were doing and had a consistent routine that they were diligently following and I felt so lost. Instagram fitness models don’t help the equation either. Wow, that’s a lot of bodies to being comparing myself to… on the DAILY which is completely unfair to my own accomplishments I have made while on my own fitness journey. This year I started my first big girl job and was feeling pretty at ease with how it was going. One of my co-workers, only a few months older than me, has been with the company longer than me and got a much deserved promotion, but I can’t help but think about how if I had gotten on my path earlier maybe I would have been in that position. Then I remember that I have worked really really hard to be where I am and I have only been in this position for less than a year!
Honestly, the amount of times I compare myself to others in a day is absurd and it hurts my heart because we’ve all been taught along the way that by X age we need to have this and by X age we need to be there… IT’S A LIE. We all need to be kinder to ourselves because the way we talk to ourselves is the way we will allow others to think of us. You set the tone and if the tone inside your head is constantly telling you you aren’t good enough, you will not amount to your potential.
I’ve been learning to start every day immediately thinking of the traits that make me who I am. The things I don’t like, I am learning to allow myself a little grace. I think we all need to remind ourselves that we are all just trying the best we can. As long as we are doing that and only comparing ourselves to who we were yesterday- we are on the right path. I’m sure someone else needed to hear this as much as I needed to write it.
Be gentle with yourself. You are doing your best. No comparison needed.
XO