What is a micro wedding? Although they have been around for years, they are definitely becoming more popular these days due to COVID. Micro weddings consist of a wedding that has 50 or less guests. A lot of 2020 brides are having to choose between micro weddings, elopements, and having a mini-mony. Even though we weren’t necessarily planning to have a wedding in 2020– we were in the midst of planning a 2021 wedding when I got laid off from my job. Because of this, we decided to move up the wedding date and plan a micro wedding in 3 weeks. (I am still in disbelief that I pulled it off. If you want an insight to how I did that… I would be happy to put together a blog post about my 3 week wedding planning process!)
Growing up I watched shows like Say Yes to The Dress and Four Weddings and imagined I would have a HUGE, elaborate wedding. Then I got older. I realized how much I disliked typical “traditions”, how much weddings cost, how stressful it can be for the bride and groom to have big weddings, and that it’s hard to spend quality time with each guest who may have traveled far and wide to be with you on your special day. Prior to COVID I was itching for a smaller wedding… it’s unfortunate the circumstances in which what I wanted actually became reality, regardless it was the picture perfect day!
1.) Guest List
This was a big one for me. We ended up having 19 people in attendance (including us!) Although there were a handful of people we truly missed dearly that day (my sweet Granny included), we felt like every person in attendance had been in support of our relationship from the get go. I already wanted to have a smaller backyard wedding in 2021. And even still… the guest list was creeping over 100. While 100 people at a wedding is a smaller event, it was still getting bigger than I was wanting. With qualms from either side of our families saying “Well, wouldn’t you like to invite this person or that person? They watched you grow up, don’t you want them to see you get married?” And while, yes, that is true. I would love to have an event where I could have every single person who has made an impact in my life recognized… that just wasn’t going to coincide with my priority of having a small wedding. This micro wedding really let me live out my dream of a small, intimate wedding.
2.) More Personal
Have you ever traveled to a wedding, spent a significant amount of money and time to be there, and then you get to see the bride and groom all of two minutes? I didn’t want that for my guests and I didn’t want that as a bride. Those two minutes are usually filled with a “thanks for coming, how was your travel, be sure to enjoy the bar and dance floor, see you later.” With only 19 people in total, we were able to have actual conversations with those we loved for the entirety of the weekend. Especially with us living far from our families and friends, it was extremely important for us to have quality time with each person… and we accomplished that and I would not give that up for anything.
3.) Casual Atmosphere
We are a pretty casual couple. We hardly ever do big date nights that include a black tie dress code. I don’t remember the last time I wore heels (didn’t even wear them on my wedding day) and I usually have to do a little begging to get Kevin into any shoes that aren’t Nike tennis shoes. Heck, we wanted a backyard BBQ wedding from the beginning! Yes, I had structure for the day (you have to! Especially with my family, those Powers need a little direction), but I left room for us to sit and mingle together. My brother officiated our wedding, Kevin got a silicone wedding band, I got my wedding flowers from Hyvee, my wedding dress came from JC Penny, we had our friend photograph our wedding, and our “dress rehearsal” was at our favorite Irish pub down the road from our apartment. Everything was casual… and perfectly us.
4.) It’s Official!
Before we got engaged we had been together for a little over 5 years, had been living together for almost 4 years, and Kevin uprooted his life in IL to follow me to Nebraska for my dream job. We were pretty much as committed as committed gets. It felt so silly to have an engagement last over a year, but we were going to do it… because that’s what you’re supposed to do, right? The reason you get engaged is to get married, though… right? Why not make it legal as soon as possible?! That’s the whole goal. It just felt so right to have a 4 month engagement instead of a 15 month engagement and that’s really all that matters.
5.) Save Money
I mean… this is a HUGE one! The national average cost of a wedding in 2019 was $33,900. I’m sorry what?! In order to declare my love in front of my family and friends I have to spend almost $35,000?! I think that is absolutely absurd and makes no sense, especially when the national salary average is $56,000. This was never our intended budget to begin with; however, decreasing the guest list by about 80 people helped us to not even come close to that national average! HA! I originally planned to spend $1,500 on my wedding dress and I ended up getting mine for $70. We saved A LOT of money by keeping it small and intimate and in the current economy and considering I lost my job, we didn’t have as much expendable income to spend on a party. Our family also helped us throughout the weekend which was SO helpful and we felt very grateful for that because I know that not every couple is put in that situation to have financial help from family.
While I am not shaming anyone who wants the large and elaborate wedding, I just knew in my gut that wasn’t for me and that I wouldn’t enjoy myself as much as if I had something smaller and more laid back. Like I said, it’s rough that we put this wedding together because I lost my dream job due to COVID (idk if you’ve noticed, but no one is having events with 500+ people at them LOL), but it really was the most perfect day that really encapsulated our relationship and who we are. Are there any other brides out there who really wanted a smaller more casual wedding, but felt the immense pressure to have a large party? I can’t be the only one!
If you are a bride-to-be… stick to what you want! Whether that be something small or something large… or maybe just the two of you and a justice of the peace… it is YOUR wedding day and something you will reflect on for years to come. Why not make it exactly what you want it to be?
XO,
Happy Wedding Planning!
